sigh. today is a shitty mitty day to conlude to a really shitty mitty weekend i had. sigh.
stop sighing aisyah or u'll be called, sigh-idah aisyah. wth.
*slaps myself*
uhh. yes. its monday morning and im in the school library cuz i have 2 free periods. since i dropped lit, i have a lot of free periods. yayness. but today was bad. i have panda eyes this morning cuz i cried myself to sleep last night. someone made me cry real bad. yea. i look like a gigantic panda. =(
then i went to school with uber conspicuous eyebags that could store one big fat piece of kueh tat in them. hah. stupid analogy. dint know why im thinking about kueh tats. anyway, to top off my monday blues, i was caught for short skirt by the disciplne headmistress and she wanted me to buy a new skirt and show it to her during recess. but i couldn't find her and i dint buy any skirt. u're so gonna die, aisyah. ergh. now i look like a gigantic and retarded panda with a super long skirt. im so not gonna touch sugar cane today. it'll make me feel like a real panda. wait, pandas eat sugar canes dont they?
during the weekends, i went for rowing trainings in the mornings. on saturday we had an ergo timetrial which i did so damn bloody badly cuz the last time i touched an ergo machine was way before the sea games! i deproved by 26secs which is like utterly horrible and totally unacceptable for a national athlete! plus, i had a heavy breakfast and i actually throwed up right after the trial. i know, yucky mucky me!! but i felt really terrible and sick. eugh. imagine the pain i went tru. my coach dint give a damn about my vomit or how shitty mitty yucky mucky i felt. he was just diassapointed cuz i deproved by a lot. thanks, man. he's de best. oh and misery doesnt end there. immediately right after the trial we had to row for like 8km. as usual i was last to take off from the pontoon and last to come back. last to wash my boat and last to do my recovery stretchings. sigh. i feel so...ergh. nevermind.
and i went home feeling bloody exhausted. seriously, i was feeling like lousy mousy like that and all i could do was sleep. and i wanted to sleep for 15 minutes but no, i slept for like a few hours. then i forced myself to wake up to do some homework. which i succcessfully did. yay for aisyah. =)
on sunday, there was morning training again. we're supposed to complete a 14km programme. i was last (as usual) and coach followed me on his motor boat. he told me to like lift up my wrist at the catch position but the water was bad and there were crosswinds and my boat was unstable. he got so dissapointed at me he started shouting! i wanted to tell him its not easy to balance and lift up my wrist and i just learned to row a singles boat and it takes time for me to learn and im not really a fast learner and im feeling tired but i wanna do it but u have to give me some time and patience but no, ure shouting at me and i feel hurt when u say mean things and i know my ex rowng partner is doing well cuz she has been rowing singles before she rowed with me and she has no school to think about and im having my a levels this year and u dont understand shit and all u care about is rowing but i have a life and i want a life! but i didnt say anything. i almost cried when the blister on my right palm like totally burst. but i tried not to think about it. i was so angry i dint want to cry. i just wanted to row the 14km and go home.
went home felt shagged but i forced myself not to sleep. managed to finish a few assignments. and thats it, i guess. louasy mousy weekend aye?
mummy will be back tomorrow. yay.
and kumar told me that i have to move on and im trying to move on and it takes time to move on and its not that easy cuz...i still love him. ergh im so stupid.
oh well, hope the rest of my monday will be fine. im looking forward to pe. and dikir after school.
love, panda-isyah.
stop sighing aisyah or u'll be called, sigh-idah aisyah. wth.
*slaps myself*
uhh. yes. its monday morning and im in the school library cuz i have 2 free periods. since i dropped lit, i have a lot of free periods. yayness. but today was bad. i have panda eyes this morning cuz i cried myself to sleep last night. someone made me cry real bad. yea. i look like a gigantic panda. =(
then i went to school with uber conspicuous eyebags that could store one big fat piece of kueh tat in them. hah. stupid analogy. dint know why im thinking about kueh tats. anyway, to top off my monday blues, i was caught for short skirt by the disciplne headmistress and she wanted me to buy a new skirt and show it to her during recess. but i couldn't find her and i dint buy any skirt. u're so gonna die, aisyah. ergh. now i look like a gigantic and retarded panda with a super long skirt. im so not gonna touch sugar cane today. it'll make me feel like a real panda. wait, pandas eat sugar canes dont they?
during the weekends, i went for rowing trainings in the mornings. on saturday we had an ergo timetrial which i did so damn bloody badly cuz the last time i touched an ergo machine was way before the sea games! i deproved by 26secs which is like utterly horrible and totally unacceptable for a national athlete! plus, i had a heavy breakfast and i actually throwed up right after the trial. i know, yucky mucky me!! but i felt really terrible and sick. eugh. imagine the pain i went tru. my coach dint give a damn about my vomit or how shitty mitty yucky mucky i felt. he was just diassapointed cuz i deproved by a lot. thanks, man. he's de best. oh and misery doesnt end there. immediately right after the trial we had to row for like 8km. as usual i was last to take off from the pontoon and last to come back. last to wash my boat and last to do my recovery stretchings. sigh. i feel so...ergh. nevermind.
and i went home feeling bloody exhausted. seriously, i was feeling like lousy mousy like that and all i could do was sleep. and i wanted to sleep for 15 minutes but no, i slept for like a few hours. then i forced myself to wake up to do some homework. which i succcessfully did. yay for aisyah. =)
on sunday, there was morning training again. we're supposed to complete a 14km programme. i was last (as usual) and coach followed me on his motor boat. he told me to like lift up my wrist at the catch position but the water was bad and there were crosswinds and my boat was unstable. he got so dissapointed at me he started shouting! i wanted to tell him its not easy to balance and lift up my wrist and i just learned to row a singles boat and it takes time for me to learn and im not really a fast learner and im feeling tired but i wanna do it but u have to give me some time and patience but no, ure shouting at me and i feel hurt when u say mean things and i know my ex rowng partner is doing well cuz she has been rowing singles before she rowed with me and she has no school to think about and im having my a levels this year and u dont understand shit and all u care about is rowing but i have a life and i want a life! but i didnt say anything. i almost cried when the blister on my right palm like totally burst. but i tried not to think about it. i was so angry i dint want to cry. i just wanted to row the 14km and go home.
went home felt shagged but i forced myself not to sleep. managed to finish a few assignments. and thats it, i guess. louasy mousy weekend aye?
mummy will be back tomorrow. yay.
and kumar told me that i have to move on and im trying to move on and it takes time to move on and its not that easy cuz...i still love him. ergh im so stupid.
oh well, hope the rest of my monday will be fine. im looking forward to pe. and dikir after school.
love, panda-isyah.
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