break up

i cant hold on, if he needs to walk away.

as hard as it is, i cant beg him to stay.

i cant hold him down, i'll try as i may.

but sometimes life isnt easy,

and things wont go my way.

so i'll hold me head up, be thankful and pray.

for the times that we spent, each and everyday.

and if its meant to be,

he'll comeback for me someday.

oooh. do u like the poster i created?? i like!! haha. aisyah's pathetic. sigh.

anyways, yes. its over between us. no more. uhh. yes. thats it. done. oh. yes. uhh.

and yes. im feeling sick and unwell. post breakup depression. and consequence of cleaning up my utterly dusty room. my eyes are itching. my nose is running. my throat is killing me. im...dying!!!! or prolly. soon. cuz im not even halfway tru my homework. not even a tenth!! not even a hundredth!!! not even...*slap*

ouch. yes. i need to go rest now. and im freaking hungry. ergh. dip strawberries in nutella and freeze them. yay.

and yes. congrats to elly hasfidah for winning the miss singapore poly title. im so proud of her. hott stuff aye? =)

sigh. shitty feeling again. good bye.

holidays

*droollly woollyyy* hah. thats wat me and yani shared when we went to eat lunch-cum-dinner at swensons together. wee. i had loads of fun. firstly cuz i havent seen her for ages. and secondly cuz she crap as much as i do. yay. haha. anyways, yup. the banana crumble was yummy yummy but became quite muak towards the last bits of it!

after eating, (and talking about fats and babats and all) we went to watch harry potter. uhh huh. on the opening day seyy. i just completed reading the book so ya. it was still nice tho. and we were oogling over cedric diggory. bloody hott. unfortunately he died in the end. whoops! just revealed the ending but i guess almost everyone must have watched harry potter and the goblet of fire by now, right?

yay. and thats me and yani. she likes this pict. i donno why. prolly the background looks macam stylo milo gitu. hah. but i like this one:

and this:

yay. and yea. last week i sleptover at her house which is like heee-uge. haha. we stayed up until like one thirty to watch vcds like 40 yr old virgin. hah. damn funny and a little obscene and when it came to the 'interesting' parts, the vcd spoilt. hah. pirated vcd...mine. =) and yani was already tired by then so we went to sleep. we continued the next morning with more movies! wee! oh. and we baked too and we ate a lot. whoa~ im gonna grow fat and die.

oh. u see, ive been trying real hard to wake up early these days to go for a run. but to no avail, man. i end up throwing my handphone on the floor, like the other day when it dropped and the screen couldnt work for like a few hours. violence. poor phone. well, i thot that maybe cuz it doesnt work i can get another fon like the motorola v3 (the pink one of cuz) ive been oogling over. but the damage was bloody temporary. shucks. haha.

and and yes...last weekend i participated in a girls street soccer competition at tampines. ooh yea. it was loads of fun. we won like 2 games out of *gasp* 6. haha. we realised how old we're getting cuz we were panting like hell during the 8 minutes matches. pathetic. actually its bcuz we have no substitutes. i have registered 8 ppl for my team but only 5 turned up so all of us had to play cuz its 5 a side. some ppl are simply disappointing. anyway, we were competing with teams with league players and all and some teams were like really really good. i was impressed. well, i guess the most important thing is not about winning but its about loving the sport and of cuz about participating. yay. BPians rock. yay. and now my legs are aching badly and i have bruises all over my shins and kneecaps. no yay.

hmmm. i havent touched my homework. i swear. im so gonna die when term starts.

oh and my mum's on her way to jeddah now for her haji. and she's stopping by dubai. ooh. i wanna go dubai! oh and why is everyone going to KL??? i wanna go there tooo... =(

anyways, i really have to start on my homework soon. like now. hah.

two weeks more. i dont wanna go back to school. help me, please?

sea games 2005

been there. done that.

yep. the sea games are over. which means. my training camp days are over. no more morning weight lifting sessions. no more after school training programmes. no more bunking out with my fellow rowers. no more of all that. honestly, from the bottom of my heart. i miss it all. yea. anyway, i've got loads to tell you about the sea games!!!

changi

the team singapore ppl sent us off. so did alyani, ms trina tay, debby, jolene, amaria, my mum, and my brothers. thank you thank you all so much for coming down early in the morning to see me off. and also to ama and arina and titey and faizul and fad and sak and nizal!!!! sorry i had to rush u guys. i dint know we had to enter the boarding gates at 8.45am. =( thanks a gazillion anyway. u guys rock. =)

manila

taking the sq flight is like WHOA. i watched a few good movies i cant remember what. oh, the march of the penguins was one of them. ooh. cute cuddly penguins. makes me wanna bring one home. hah. then i decided to play mario and pokemon on nintendo. yea. too bad its only a 3 hrs flight. they served me fish for lunch. damn. mine was muslim meal so i ended up eating rice only. touchdown was quick and fast. i mean really fast. we dint have to queue up to get our passports checked and all. they ushered us to a room, presented us with the sea games logo (that head with the funky headgear) which they made it into a necklace. and we waited for them to return with our checked passports. together with our bags. we felt...like vips u know. hah. more on prestigous service later. got onto the mini bus and on our way to the hotel.

great eastern hotel

it took us abt an hour to reach the hotel. it could have taken us half the time if it wasnt for the heavy traffic. i mean, really heavy. and the sad thing is, its considered normal in manila. damn. the bus hardly moved at all! pedestrians had to cover their noses and mouths with handkerchiefs cuz pollution in the city is Bad. policemen walked around with shotguns and rifles. the weather was hot. like when u carry an umbrella in singapore when its sunny, u would be called sissy. but in philippines, the sun is so scorching plus the poor air pollution, its okay to use an umbrella on sunny days. and we finally reached the hotel. supposedly the only first class hotel in manila. well, not bad la. but it would have been a three star hotel if it was in singapore. went up to our room. my roomies were shuying (my partner) and elsie (the silver medalist). our room was kinda big. but it had no windows. i am dead serious. no windows. rain or shine. night or dark. we dont know. haha.

la mesa dam

thats where we rowed. we had to pass at least 3 security checks before entering the dam. and we saw soldiers with huge guns again. its scary i tell you. and everytime we enter and leave the dam they check. so we enter the dam once in the morning leave in the afternoon. come back after lunch and leave in the evening. so they check at least 12 times everyday. and mind you, its only one team per bus. they have to check almost 6 buses per day! scary? tell me abt it. and everytime we leave the hotel, we have security guards with us. its kinda cool la. when we travel in the bus, there'll be at least 2 police motorbikes travelling together and when there's a mini jam, we get the privellege to go first. haha. cool aye?

HOTTT guys

what else, aisyah? what else? haha. yea. firstly, i met rowell. he's still tall and hot but with a girl in hand, it will minus 100 points off his hot factor. haha. yea, we talked. he's married for about a month and his wife is pregnant like 5 months. yea. and NO im not sad abt it. not at all.

made friends with the thai guys. they are damn blardy hot lah. they have weird terribly long names like rutthanapol, choetchet and phuttaranska. whataver la. haha. but i call them pat, pan, chey, chang, moe, boe, chet. haha. funny. anyway, yes. when they change into their unisuits, and if ure lucky, u get a sneakpeak at their abs and oh my oh my, they are just simply damn blardy hot lah ok? haha. but when i talk to them they cant understand english for nuts! haha. well, some of them can make it but some of them just cant. who cares? i went party with them. they drank like beer was free, they were really funny. they were cool people and yea, i miss them!

damn hot thai guys. *sigh*

mynamar guys look as if they lived in the 80s but they were super gentlemen. philippine guys dont wanna mix with the others cuz they think they're superior, except one of them who was a reserve. mark anthony. he rocks la. rowell's friend. indo guys like to talk to me but i can hardly understand what they're saying. haha. sorry la my bahasa isnt that good. but they're a nice bunch. i even talked to one until like 2am on the last day.

oh, how can i forget. singapore guys. of cuz they're hot. hot tempered. haha. nolah. my kumar is still the hottest guy around. and mimi (who won bronze) will always be hot in rowing. c'mon man. he beat the 4th indo by one sec to get third! but unfortunatley, lost to the 2nd vietnam guy by one second!!

the race

there were 6 boats in our race. 6 boats per race. we had a preliminary round which will determine the lanes we race for the finals. we came in 3rd. beating philippines, mynmar and m'sia but losing to vietnam and indo. it was a really good race. but we knew most of the teams were conserving energy for the finals which means they weren't going all out. and on the day of our finals, i was blardy nervous. i couldnt stop walking around trying to ease myself. seriously, ppl were so worried i would cock up the race if i continue to get like super nervous. which unfortunately, i did. the race was bad. and i dont wish to tell the rest.

shopping

shopping after the race made me feel lots better. the shopping centers in manila were HUGE. met karla once before the race and she brought me to SM North Edsa which is like twice suntec city. and karla told me its one of the smallest malls! the best thing is, the things are blardy cheap! haha. after the race, me and shuying brought the singapore team to SM. then we also went to one of the shopping villages in makati (or was it pasig) and market! market! which was one of the biggest shopping centers ive been too. its really really huge! but wait. there's SM megamall which i dint go to but i saw it!! i saw the BIGGEST Shopping center in manila! and yes, it was ENORMOUS!! like 5 times of suntec? wow. if u think singapore is a shopping paradise, u havent seen manila!!! haha. *so excited* i wanna go there again!!! hah.

home

yea. i came i saw and i conquered ( the shopping centers) haha. it was a wonderful trip despite not bringing home any medals. there's always a next time. yea, thats what they said to me when i finished the race. also, we're the youngest participants. and with the least experience. the indo women in our race have been rowing together for at least 6 years. hah. so, i was very disappointed but then, there's nothing i could do. when we reached changi last night, the winners were wearing their medals over their neck. i was sad, really. but i held my head up.

ive gotten this far. and yes, im proud of it. =)

uhhuh. its over. for now.