gaah. first week of school is over.
1. school is being nice now. not much work, yet. readings have been as usual, crazy. it is confirmed that i am the only yr 3 in my lvl 4 class. and it is true that theres an essay every week. i have been studying during my free periods alone. (i know right). and i was actually paying attn in einstein's class- something on relativity. i dont understand shit but i remember not falling asleep. to me, its an achievement. it doesnt matter how slow you go, as long as you dont stop, remember? right.
2. ive been running with syahir around woodlands. i still havent gotten used to it, yet. back to square one. i wonder if i can ever do an 11mins 2.4km again or run for 10k without feeling pain or feeling like shit. syahir said i was slow. that idiot, but i'll sure be sad when he leaves for ns. running buddy, anyone?
3. everyone's gonna leave. i hate everyone who's leaving or who has left or who's supposed to graduate with me but is not going to and now i have to find ppl to throw my graduation hats with :(

ugh.

4. i sparred during silat trng for the first time since my fall last yr. its been a yr already, time really flies, MasyaAllah. fighting was addictive. but the aftermath was awful. my ankle's swollen, my arm and finger are badly bruised. when i showed my mum, she gave the funniest comments: "WHY UNTIL LIKE THAT? KAN SAKIT." then she pressed her finger on the bruise. "Im going to talk to your coach".
5. went for alia's halal party last night at aloha loyang. takder lagi jauh, i know. the tjunx had a gathering, it was fun. a bit, umm, odd. other than we feeling very underdressed and left out, i had to pretend it was OKAY when i had to see his face. but other than that. "good job" to us we put a smile on fairuz's face. we saw birdman. alia had a time of her life turning a yr older. and yeah, i took 2 hours to reach home. i dont want to talk about that.
6. sometimes, coaching netball to kids make you want to scream your head off, but most of the time, no matter how annoying they are, they definitely do make me smile. :)
7. brooding period's definitely over but theres still some hurt and pain here and there. like they say, time will heal, and im just waiting to be fully recovered. but meanwhile, i think i should get up on my ass and start moving on. MOVING ON is a bitch, but i dont wanna be a loser, going after a guy who wont even stand up for me. sometimes u wonder whether they really did love u as much as you thought they did. but sometimes, the best thing to do is just not to think about it. like when you initiate a convo with ur ex and he's being very curt and hostile and cold (and he tells you that its for the better and you stupidly nod in agreement), might as well not bother initiating the convo in the first place and get spared from getting hurt, right?
oh well.

cheers, to a better week ahead, insyaAllah.